A Spider
by Elf
Summary: The Gundam Pilots all react differently when they encounter a spider. So, who's the acrophobic, and who just wants everyone to be quiet while he sleeps?


_**Disclaimer: **_All rights and privileges to Shin Kidousenki Gundam Wing are trademarks and property of Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties. The characters of these works are used WITHOUT permission for the purpose of entertainment only. This work of fiction is not meant for sale or profit.   
  


_**Author's Notes: **_I'd like to thank Katrina and Marce, my two artistic friends. What the hell, am I getting sentimental? To Lee, who hates spiders as much as I do. Hail to the king, baby.   
  


_**A Spider**_

**_By Elf_**   
  


Quatre Rabeba Winner walked through the Sanq kingdom palace with a cup of hot tea in his hand. The soft rays of morning sunshine were breaking through the crimson drapes on the huge French windows. Quatre smiled to himself as he walked into the study. He sipped on his hot, sweet tea as he looked in the room.   
  


For a moment, he looked down to see the hugest spider that he had ever seen. He stood paralyzed in fear as the black arachnid lifted up one of its eight legs and waved it at the Sandrock pilot mockingly. "_EIIIEEEEIIIIII!" _Quatre screamed as he hopped up . . .   
  


Right into the arms of Trowa Barton.   
  


Trowa automatically caught the screaming Arab as he looked down at the floor. He asked, "What is it?"   
  


"A really big spider!" Quatre shrieked as he pointed to the offending creature. He tried to scramble higher away from the spider, almost crawling up Trowa's chest onto his shoulders. The pilot moved his head so Quatre saw both dark green eyes as he looked down at the spider.   
  


Trowa swallowed and didn't move. His dark green eyes were huge as he studied the offending creature. Was Trowa afraid too?   
  


Wufei walked into the study, hearing Quatre's screams, and asked, "What is it?" Then he saw the spider. He shouted, "Akkkkck! Injustice! You evil creature!"   
  


He backed behind Trowa, all the while, shouting at the spider, "Injustice, you weakling, you should be ashamed, weakling! You woman! This is nothing! You are nothing! You have no honor! You prey on the weak! Therefore, you are weak! Injustice!"   
  


Quatre whimpered and tried to climb higher on the frozen Trowa. Heero walked into the room, where Wufei was screaming that the spider had no honor, Quatre climbing all over Trowa, and Trowa standing like a silent statue.   
  


Quatre shouted, "Heero, there's a spider! Your mission is to kill it!"   
  


Heero sent the Arab the Death Glare and drew his gun. He said, "Mission Accepted. I will kill you." He pointed his gun at the spider, aimed, and fired. The spider had moved out of the way, avoiding the shot. Heero took more shots at it. He missed.   
  


He told the spider, "I will kill you!"   
  


"Aiiieeeiieeaaiieeiieeeeaaeeeiiii!" Quatre screamed as he held onto Trowa.   
  


"Injustice! You weak woman! You have no honor!" Wufei cried at it.   
  


"....." Was what Trowa said.   
  


Heero took aim again, shooting at the spider. He pulled the trigger as the spider waved one of its legs at the Wing pilot. It clicked harmlessly. He was out of bullets. Bullet holes were all over the wooden floor.   
  


Relena, having heard the commotion, ran into the room. She looked at Heero aiming at the spider, Quatre climbing on the paralyzed Trowa, and Wufei screaming, "Weakling! Fight me! You have no honor! Injustice!"   
  


She picked the spider off the ground and snapped, "You four should be ashamed of yourself. It's just a harmless spider! He did nothing to you! Your warlike ideas are why the world the way it is."   
  


As she was going on to the four ashamed pilots, a groggy Duo walked in. He was dressed in his tank top and sweats, strands of his chestnut hair were sticking up all over his braid and his violet eyes were half closed. He padded in the room in his socks, walked over to Relena, took the spider from her hands, and crushed it in his.   
  


He dropped the spider guts to the ground while everyone looked at him with wide eyes. He looked at Relena and wiped the hand that he had gotten spider guts on her blouse. Relena sputtered, "That was an innocent creature! How dare you!"   
  


"The God of Death is back from Hell," Duo told her as he began to pad out of the room again, "But right now, I need some sleep."   
  


Quatre asked, "Duo, how were you able to do that?"   
  


"You are the strongest warrior alive," Wufei said in awe.   
  


Trowa just looked at him while Heero, as always, glared. Duo turned around at the group, still groggy and sluggish.   
  


He answered, "I grabbed him and went _crunch_. It's not that hard. Any idiot can do it. Now, I may be the God of Death, but I still need some sleep." With that he turned and walked to his bedroom, grumbling, "Heero, for a guy who never talks, makes enough noise to wake the dead. Quatre screams like a girl, Wufei is always going about injustice, and Relena . . . Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch. Damn, a guy can't get any rest around here."   
  


Everyone looked at each other. Quatre slid from Trowa's arms with a blush. Heero said to Relena, "You may want to get that out." He looked at the spider gore hand print on her white blouse.   
  


Relena beamed, glad that Heero had looked at her. She stuttered, "I will do that right away Heero."   
  


"Whatever," Heero said as he walked off, having stuff to do on his laptop.   
  


Wufei said, "I would have never guessed that Duo Maxwell was the world's strongest warrior. I'll be damned."   
  


Trowa left the room, leaving everyone else in awkward silence.   
  


_**The End! **_   
  


Just a little break from "A Shade Darker", and to prove that I can write something without vampires in it. :) Still looking for fan art work though. E-mail it to slaybrat@aye.net or slayerbrat@yahoo.com. Thanks!_****_


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